On January 4, 1859, Spurgeon gave his first public lecture at Exeter Hall for the Young Men’s Christian Association. He began, “I do not feel in my place here to-night. This is the very first occasion in my life upon which I have ever presented myself before the public as a lecturer – at least before any audience worthy of being called a multitude.” As a famous preacher, Spurgeon regularly turned down invitations to give lectures on random topics of public interest, even when the organizers offered to pay him handsomely. On this occasion, he agreed to lecture, but he warned his hearers that he would still preach, “Do whatever I may, I shall have to preach a sermon to-night. I cannot lecture anyhow; I told your Secretary so; and I tell you so also, so that when you shall retire you will say, ‘Well, I am disappointed, but it is just as he said it would be.’”
The title of his lecture was De Propaganda Fide, on the propagation of the Christian faith. After describing the wrong ways Christians attempt to spread their faith and what it truly is, Spurgeon concluded with a charge for those attending to engage in conversational evangelism. He called it “the art of conversation.” What advice did he have for them?
Don’t dominate the conversation
Have you noticed in these times, that if you have a dozen people together they either talk about nothing, or else about something they had better have left alone; and if they happen to spend a pleasant evening at all, it is owing to some one body who has all the talk to himself. Very useful and pleasant to him, I dare say; as Mr. Smith said to his friends, after he had eaten all the dinner on the Christmas day, “I hope, dear friends, you have enjoyed yourselves.” The good Mr. Smith talks all evening himself, and no one can thrust a word in edgeways, and then he imagines that it has been a very delightful party.
In groups where people are not naturally talkative, be careful not to dominate the conversation. The art of conversation involves drawing people out, asking good questions, and fostering good conversation. The goal is not simply to be a charismatic speaker but a helpful facilitator, prompting meaningful conversation that draws everyone in.
Learn to converse with people individually
Some of us cannot speak – or think we cannot – would not like to – unless we had fifty or a hundred for an audience – we should like a thousand perhaps all the better.
Spurgeon envisions a young man delivering a fine lecture on some random topic (“Was Judas Iscariot first or third cousin to Julius Caesar?”) to the great applause of all listening. But then,
He goes home. There are five or six young men up in the common room sitting together; he has nothing to say there… Now what we want to breed in our churches is a set of men that know how to shoot at an individual, and who know how to scatter Gospel shot among a small knot of persons.
How many young preachers have well-studied theological arguments, polished off their sermon manuscripts, and furiously defended the faith online, but when interacting with people in person, they are utterly unprepared? Public teaching is a useful skill, but a pastor must also be able to bring edifying conversation naturally with their people. Otherwise, all that preaching will appear to be for show.
Be intentional with edifying conversation
The art of conversation: Will you try and study it? It will take you a long time to get at it. You will have to say to yourself, “Now, I am likely to see five or six to-night; what shall I make them talk about?” The conversation may run upon something you do not like – light, frivolous, perhaps licentious; now your business is to turn it, just as the pointsman turns the train on the railway. You are not to place yourself in front of the train, and say, “Now, heave back there; you shall not come this way.” You are to act more dexterously than that. You are just to turn the points the right way, and keep the train going in the right direction…
If you are going to grow in the art of conversation, this will take preparation and planning. The opportunities for meaningful conversation are numerous: you might be going out to a movie with friends, grabbing dinner, going on a long car ride, working on a home project, or countless other situations. Learn to see these times as opportunities for meaningful conversation.
Of course, meaningful conversation will not happen naturally. You will need to work on the skill of turning the conversation. Don’t just impose your will and abruptly change the topic. Rather, in the flow of the conversation, look for opportunities to turn the discussion naturally toward deeper topics that matter — struggles, hopes, purpose, identity, love, faith, etc… This doesn’t mean you have to get to a gospel presentation at every event. Each conversation can be a building block, leading to the gospel. But this will not happen without intentionality and patience.
Be willing to speak about Christ
At some point, however, the goal is to speak about Christ.
… and then, taking your companions, as it were, by guile, you are to bring in Christ Jesus; without their hardly knowing what you are at, you are to begin talking of the things of Christ to them; and you cannot tell what miracles and wonders will be accomplished by the simple art of conversation.
It would be easy to assume that evangelism was easy in Spurgeon’s Victorian England, where church-going was much more common. But even then, the unbeliever might have his guard up if he perceived that you were trying to proselytize him, hence the need, not for deception, but for conversational skill.
This kind of skill continues to be crucial in our evangelism, especially in our post-modern society. For so many, unless they perceive that you care for them and understand their perspective, there will not be an opportunity to talk about Christ. But for those who are skilled in the art of conversation, there can be many opportunities to share about the difference Christ has made in our lives and to invite others to consider His claims.
Pray!
You must add, however, to this, most fervent prayer; and again I must reiterate the same truth – with this prayer must go an inward travailing of soul, on account of that person for whom you are interested. If you shall select any one person, and he shall be made the subject of your intense anxiety and earnest prayer, you shall not miss your reward in that instance. I invite you to try it. If you are believers in Christ, try it. You may seem to fail, but fail you cannot; good must be done, and the answer from Heaven must be sent. Only try it.
At the end of the day, salvation belongs to the Lord, not to us. Skilled as we may be in the art of conversation, all is in vain unless the Lord works. And so we must pray. And we must persevere in prayer and faith. There will be instances where we will fail, but as we pray, God can use even our failing efforts. Pray, ultimately trusting not in your efforts but in God’s power and grace.
Conclusion
How will the Christian faith be passed on from generation to generation? In large part through the efforts of individual Christians to speak of Christ to those around them. But this does not happen only through scheduled programs, rehearsed presentations, and evangelistic events (though God can certainly use those!). Instead, so often, it happens as Christians prayerfully and intentionally engage in natural conversations with their neighbors. May we have open eyes and bold hearts for the opportunities around us!